Engagement
Mangni / Kurmai
ਮੰਗਣੀ / ਕੁੜਮਾਈ
Rings exchanged, often with an ardaas at the gurdwara.
The official engagement. Both families gather, an ardaas is performed (sometimes at a gurdwara, sometimes at home), rings are exchanged, and the wedding date is announced. Larger and more public than the roka.
A little history
‘Kurmai’ literally means ‘becoming kurma’ (related families). In rural Punjab the kurmai was where the bride’s family would gift the groom seven items including a kara, ring, and shawl. Many families still follow this exact format.
Who attends
Immediate family + close cousins, mama-mami, chacha-chachi, nani-nana. Some families also invite a few close family friends.
Typical guests
40–80 people
What to plan
- Engagement rings (both)
- Seven shagun items for groom (kara, kurta, kashera, shawl, sweets, dry fruit, cash)
- Tikka & chunni for the bride’s family to receive
- Venue booking (if not at home)
- Small live singer or dholki optional
- Photographer for the ring exchange
- Catering / lunch for ~60
Samaan checklist
Avoid these mistakes
- Don’t schedule it the same week as the wedding — leave at least a month
- Confirm whether the gurdwara allows mangni (some do not, only roka)
- Brief the photographer on which moments to capture (ring exchange, ardaas, tikka)
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